Actually doing it...

Your comprehensive resource for Divorce.

Upcoming Events

Dating News
Upcoming FREE Dating Seminars To Be Determined
Divorce Topics
Child Support Coping Strategies Child Custody Dating Again Deciding To Legal Issues Money Separation Before Divorce Stepfamilies Children of Divorce

Divorce Articles
Addiction After Divorce Annulment Child Support Computer Addiction Cope with Divorce Costs of Divorce Divorce and Children Divorce Mistakes Divorce Overseas Domestic Abuse Foreign Divorce Help Kids with Divorce Legal Separation Marital Affairs Marriage Problems No Child Support Sexless Marriage Single Parents Step Families Tell Kids about Divorce Types of Divorce Visitation Rights

Divorce Law

Alabama Divorce Laws
Alaska Divorce Laws
Arizona Divorce Laws
Arkansas Divorce Laws
California Divorce Laws
Colorado Divorce Laws
Connecticut Divorce Laws
Delaware Divorce Laws
Florida Divorce Laws
Georgia Divorce Laws
Hawaii Divorce Laws
Idaho Divorce Laws
Illinois Divorce Laws
Indiana Divorce Laws
Iowa Divorce Laws
Kansas Divorce Laws
Kentucky Divorce Laws
Louisiana Divorce Laws
Maine Divorce Laws
Maryland Divorce Laws
Massachusetts Divorce Laws
Michigan Divorce Laws
Minnesota Divorce Laws
Mississippi Divorce Laws
Missouri Divorce Laws
Montana Divorce Laws
Nebraska Divorce Laws
Nevada Divorce Laws
New Hampshire Divorce Laws
New Jersey Divorce Laws
New Mexico Divorce Laws
New York Divorce Laws
North Carolina Divorce Laws
North Dakota Divorce Laws
Ohio Divorce Laws
Oklahoma Divorce Laws
Oregon Divorce Laws
Pennsylvania Divorce Laws
Rhode Island Divorce Laws
South Carolina Divorce Laws
South Dakota Divorce Laws
Tenessee Divorce Laws
Texas Divorce Laws
Utah Divorce Laws
Vermont Divorce Laws
Virginia Divorce Laws
Washington Divorce Laws
West Virginia Divorce Laws
Wisconsin Divorce Laws
Wyoming Divorce Laws

Welcome to 1st Divorce!

Printable Version | Send to Friend
Subscribe | Add to Favorites

whydididoit

Newbie

Posts: 2
Registered: 03-19-2013
Location:

posted on 03-19-2013 at 09:38

Actually doing it...

So here's my situation. Sorry if it takes a little while. I am originally from Europe and I met my wife whilst visiting the US. She was a permanent resident there and has three children.

To cut a long story short, we got married, she moved with me to Europe and her children stayed with their grandparents for a while until we got settled. Then they moved over to be with us.

After about 2 years there (with numerous horrible fights and constant FALSE alligations of cheating from her as well as some good times) I decided that I really needed to change jobs because I hated mine. I got another job offer and accepted it - the only problem was that it was for less money. This did not please my wife and she made such a scene that I ended up not taking the job and asking my employer at the time if they could transfer me somewhere else - they did - to the US (Texas to be precise).

So we've been here for about 6 months. She hates the place. I like it. We fight all the time. Even before moving here I have been wanting it to be over in some way or another. I never really knew exactly what the problem is but, basically, I just don't feel in love with her anymore. Yes, I care for her and the children but I am miserable in the situation. I currently take two medications for depression and all it does is take away the crippling lows - I am still far from happy and I do not believe that I ever will be if I stay married. Anyway, I told her recently how I felt. She went crazy - ended up hitting me. I threatened to call the police but she begged me not to because it could affect her custody agreement with her ex husband. This is not the first time she hit me. She was regularly physically abusive and it happend so often that I sometimes retaliated - just to keep her off of me and stop the strangling, scratching and punching. Anyway - this is the first time anything like that has happened in a long time.

She says she still loves me and that I am not trying enough. She says that she demands to go back to Europe and that I go with her - otherwise I am not committed to her and have been lying about ever loving her. But I really don't want to go. I don't want to be with her - here or anywhere else really, so I certainly refuse to move 1000s of miles to somewhere I don't want to go for someone I don't want to be with.

Now I really feel that I have to leave. I am not going to be emotionally blackmailed into moving to Europe with her and she refuses to stay here.

My main concern is her reaction if I should move out of the house and actually leave her. She makes all kinds of threats like sending abusive e-mails and making false aligations of everything and anyone and copying in everyone at my work (1000s of people).

Since I have seriously mentioned breaking up she has called me every name under the sun, punched me and made a load of threats.

What should I do? I want to leave and I can't stay for the sake of my sanity (and ultimately hers).

I have offered to fund her trip back to Europe, help her arrange a rental place, pay for some of her belongings to go back, and to pay her half of my salary for almost 36 months.

Now she says that I am trying to buy her off and that I am treating her like an object. Well, I don't see it that way. It's like I am obliged to stay with her for good under her terms. I am just making this offer so that she can easily get back on her feet and so that the children won't have to deal with financial hardship.

Any thoughts or ideas would be appreciated.

View All Replies By whydididoit (only searches replies by default, for topics please run another search)

oobie

Junior Member

Posts: 3
Registered: 07-20-2020
Location: Lagos Nigeria

posted on 07-21-2020 at 13:37

Be honest man

You got her to your own country. You promised her married and faithful. Her children trust you be honest man.

Married is not joy man it is many many difficults. You are not strong when need by her when even she may weaked and small. You are man. You must stop nonsense and become smart than her emotion is.

My father say to me You must stop childish. You must stop cry. No son of mine unless stop childish and be responsible man.

I offer same advice to you man.

View All Replies By oobie (only searches replies by default, for topics please run another search)

Printable Version | Send to Friend
Subscribe | Add to Favorites

Processed in 1.765 seconds, 9 queries

Divorce reserves the right to block, delete, or edit any and all posts. The Moderator has sole discretion on the content of this site. Anyone who posts accepts these terms, and waives any and all rights to bring any legal action against Divorce. If you disapprove of any of the above, do not use, read, or post in Divorce
498

User Functions
Username: Password: Don't have an account yet? Sign up as a New User
User Control Panel

Forum Posts

Order: New Views Posts

Latest Forum Posts

Divorce Lawyers

Alabama Lawyers
Alaska Lawyers
Arizona Lawyers
Arkansas Lawyers
California Lawyers
Colorado Lawyers
Connecticut Lawyers
Delaware Lawyers
Florida Lawyers
Georgia Lawyers
Hawaii Lawyers
Idaho Lawyers
Illinois Lawyers
Indiana Lawyers
Iowa Lawyers
Kansas Lawyers
Kentucky Lawyers
Louisianna Lawyers
Maine Lawyers
Maryland Lawyers
Massachusetts Lawyers
Michigan Lawyers
Minnesota Lawyers
Mississippi Lawyers
Missouri Lawyers
Montana Lawyers
Nebraska Lawyers
Nevada Lawyers
New Hampshire Lawyers
New Jersey Lawyers
New Mexico Lawyers
New York Lawyers
North Carolina Lawyers
North Dakota Lawyers
Ohio Lawyers
Oklahoma Lawyers
Oregon Lawyers
Pennsylvania Lawyers
Rhode Island Lawyers
South Carolina Lawyers
South Dakota Lawyers
Tennessee Lawyers
Texas Lawyers
Utah Lawyers
Vermont Lawyers
Virginia Lawyers
Washington Lawyers
West Virginia Lawyers
Wisconsin Lawyers

Women's Profiles

#498