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skipper

Junior Member

Posts: 22
Registered: 12-05-2011
Location:

posted on 12-05-2011 at 09:31

when most men don't find you attractive

I am an older female virgin. I haven't had a date in years.
My virginity has nothing whatsoever to do with "saving myself for marriage" and everything to do with lack of opportunity. I've been very plain most of my life and live in a town with a much larger female than male population.
In the past year I have attempted to participate in discussions at
http://www.loveshack.org/
http://incel.myonlineplace.org/forum/
http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/
http://www.asexuality.org/home/
but none of them seem to apply to me, or to women in general. I had always thought there were more women than men who were virgins, but after reading these topics, I've learned I was wrong.
Those forums have not been very useful because:
1. Most of the participants are bitter men.
2. There is the assumption that only men can be involuntarily celibate, not women, that a woman can have any men she wants.
3. The incel support group refuses to talk about one's appearance.
4. I don't believe I am asexual.
I am wondering if there are any women here who are in my situation.
Yes, it's true that I could have readily slept with a certain group of men at any time in my life. However, I have never found men who were drunk; homeless; still living in his parents' basement; and/or has a severe mental, physical or emotional disability attractive. When you are a woman who isn't much to look at and live in a town where the gender ratios are really off, these are about the only options you have.

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kissypop87

Newbie

Posts: 2
Registered: 12-08-2011
Location:

posted on 12-11-2011 at 14:50

Hi...

Hi Skippy,
Are you really unattractive? I am a woman myself, I am 24 years old still a virgin. For me it is by choice. I am also still at home at the moment.
My issue would be more so that I want to get with men I actually want. I plan on waiting a while for this.
Anyways, I have seen men with "unattractive" women who I thought were without a doubt gorgeous men. I am not sure if they had much to offer though.

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anonymousperson

Junior Member

Posts: 21
Registered: 03-27-2011
Location:

posted on 02-22-2012 at 12:05

your post

well you know, small towns are evil. let me guess, everyone knows who you are, right? just kidding.

why don't you show us a sexy pic of yourself and Then I will be the judge to say if your not really much to look at. also why don't you find the particular types of men you talk about attractive? is there a reason or are you just being shallow. You know, In my early twenties I lived with my grandmother for a while until I was fortionate enough to get the chance to have my own place. why don't you give the guys living with there parent's or grandparent's a chance. you can't not find them attractive just because they live with there parent's.

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IambicBlonde

Newbie

Posts: 2
Registered: 03-03-2012
Location:

posted on 03-03-2012 at 09:11

Just wondering...

...do you consider yourself plain physically, or because you don't conform to the "uniform" of what people find attractive? You know, the right hairstyle or clothes or way of talking, etc. I'm sorry that you haven't had any luck as of yet. I'm a 35 year old man, a virgin and from a town of less than 1,000 people. I often wonder what I'm missing out on, and if each year that goes by I'm wasting what precious time I have left in my looks - as shallow as that might sound. I'm sure women have that same anxiety, perhaps moreso. At any rate I think it's great you haven't lowered your standards and had an awful first experience with some jerk, or someone who would only make you feel worse. I hope you've found some comfort here or with the women in that post. I just joined here but if you need someone with which to talk about it, I'd be happy to. I don't have a motive or agenda. Just looking for others like me. I wish you luck. :-)

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