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Author: Parthena Subject: Are you still a virgin if you have sex anally?
Nessa Freemen
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posted on 02-25-2004 at 22:12 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
Are you still a virgin if you have sex anally?

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Nessa Freemen
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posted on 02-25-2004 at 23:43 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator


I have sex anally alll the time. My boyfriend likes it, so it doesn't bother me. I just wont give it up yet. But we still have fun doing it anally. He doesn't mind that I don't want to have sex yet. He said when I am ready.
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joe
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posted on 02-28-2004 at 21:27 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator


HI, If no penis has entered the vagina than she is still a virgin as far as I am concerned. I think anal sex is a great way for girls to save their virginity. It is also a great method of birth control.
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Cindy15
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posted on 02-28-2004 at 21:30 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator


After I read this about anal I diced to give it a try last night. My boyfriend absolutely loved it. So now he is happy and I am still a virgin. It hurt at first but he took it very slowly and after a while it felt good and I even had an orgasm. He said this was better then anything he had because when I came my butt contracted over and over squeezing him. And this made him come at the same time I did. I like this much better than giving him blow jobs all the time and it feels really good.
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Cindy15
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posted on 03-01-2004 at 21:14 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator


After I read this about anal I diced to give it a try last night. My boyfriend absolutely loved it. So now he is happy and I am still a virgin. It hurt at first but he took it very slowly and after a while it felt good and I even had an orgasm. He said this was better then anything he had because when I came my butt contracted over and over squeezing him. And this made him come at the same time I did. I like this much better than giving him blow jobs all the time and it feels really good.
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Barbara
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posted on 05-28-2004 at 17:23 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
Anal is his favorite way of doing it

I've found that telling men that you do it anally really turns them on. I had done it with two other guys before my present boyfriend. The first guy was real thick but he took it slow because I was afraid at first. He would take it out if it hurt and then try again. I found that foreplay made it easier to go in plus we use a vanilla scented lotion on the penis. It makes us horny everytime we smell vanilla!
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guyvirgin1977
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Registered: 10-03-2004
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posted on 10-03-2004 at 19:27 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
You guys are wrong

ANAL SEX IS DEFINITELY SEX! UNLESS YOU ARE NIAVE ENOUGH TO BELIEVE THAT ALL GAY GUYS ARE VIRGINS!
You can get all SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASES THROUGH ANAL SEX!
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guyvirgin1977
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posted on 10-03-2004 at 19:42 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
And of course he dosen't mind

He's still having sex- Nessa why would he mind? He's still getting off!! I really don't know what you think your "not giving up"
What? oh.....you are not letting him slam the hole that's not even an inch away from the hole he is slamming? oh wow you are saving alot:P
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Old_Fashioned
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posted on 10-05-2004 at 22:51 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
Hmmmm

I thought I replied to this already?? Yes you are still a virgin even if you have sex analy. Legal deffiniiton of losing your virginity is when a mans penis (not toy or fingers) enters your virgina. I admire your will to wait for the right time and for giving a good example to the new generation of women.
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guyvirgin1977
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posted on 10-15-2004 at 18:20 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
YES anal and oral sex are still SEX! If you have sex you are not a virgin

I already posted this under "should I wait ?"but I think it will certainly answer your question so I will post it again here:D

Alright, take a deep breath and say it with me: "Oral SEX."
Ever since the whole Bill Clinton/Monica Lewinsky thing, oral sex has been on everyone's lips (excuse the pun). The Clinton scandal raised a bunch of issues: Is oral sex considered "sex"? If you have oral sex, but "don't go all the way" (have vaginal intercourse), are you still a virgin? And is oral sex safe — or can it pass infection? (More on that later . . .)
According to some recent studies, most teenagers define "sex" as vaginal intercourse — they don't consider oral sex to be "sex." This isn't surprising, since that's how our culture has traditionally defined sex (which, incidentally, leaves out gays and lesbians altogether). So, there are a lot of self-proclaimed virgins out there who haven't "gone all the way," but will do "everything else but," including oral sex.
The abundance of these "technical virgins" definitely has a lot to do with how society views virginity — as a really big deal, especially for girls. Whether you lose your virginity on prom night or on your wedding night, it's your first time and it'd better be perfect and with the "right" person —
It is true that some people believe that an intact hymen — is proof of a woman's virginity. But many people don't believe the condition of the hymen is adequate for defining virginity. They know that it's possible for a woman's hymen to become stretched open even if she's never had vaginal intercourse.
Many teens say that "having sex" is considered slutty, but "just fooling around" is no big deal. Whether you're having intercourse or "just" outercourse — sex play that doesn't involve vaginal intercourse, like oral sex — many of the same issues apply.
Despite what some people might think or say, oral sex does count — because just as with intercourse, there can be emotional and physical consequences to consider.
When we talk about risk, it's often in reference to physical issues like sexually transmitted infections and pregnancy. But like intercourse, outercourse is sex play that also involves emotional risks. Will having oral sex change how you think about yourself and about your relationship? Will you expect more commitment or emotional closeness from your partner? Will you be doing it for the wrong reasons — like, because you think everyone else is doing it or because your partner is putting pressure on you?
It's true that if someone is only having oral sex, there's no worry about getting pregnant. But the physical risk of contracting a sexually transmitted infection is there. Studies show that teenagers, and the majority of adults, rarely use protection — a condom or dental dam — when having oral sex. Why? Explanations range from, "What's the point?" to, "I don't think it's a high-risk activity."
The risk of contracting a sexually transmitted infection from oral sex is lower than it is from vaginal or anal intercourse — but there's still a risk. There are only a few cases in which people may have contracted HIV through oral sex. But infections such as gonorrhea, syphilis, and herpes can be transmitted by having unprotected oral sex, too.
When it comes to oral sex, if you're not with a partner whom you know does not have an infection, then using protection during oral sex is key to reduce the risk of passing infection.
And all of this applies not only to teenagers, but also to everyone — including the president of the United States.

how many believe that no matter what sexual acts you engage in, you can still consider yourself a virgin as long as a penis doesn't enter your vagina?
It seems that maybe the rules are loosening a bit on this one, with some people being convinced that oral sex is not sex. In other words, you can blow the entire football team, deal out a few thousand handjobs, receive oral until you're raw, and even go for the occasional anal sex, but still say you're a virgin, if it's only by the slimmest of technicalities?
So do you think that even if a girl has a five-some--- gives a blowjob to a one, whilst simultaneously giving hand jobs to two strangers while getting shagged up the butt by the fourth , she has the right to consider herself a virgin? Is there really anyone out there delusional enough to think that she is a virgin?
Let's be honest. Any time a penis is inserted into ANY bodily orifice, or genitals come into prolonged physical contact with someone's mouth, virginity is lost. Granted, it's not quite the same as going "all the way," but it IS sexual contact, there IS insertion of some kind or another, and there is, ideally anyway , some kind of orgasm.
If you still aren't convinced then please answer these questions yes or no.
Are lesbians who have been given oral sex till they are raw still virgins?
Are homo men who get it up the butt till they are bloody still virgins?
What we've managed to do to virginity would be like rewording the Ten Commandments so that everyone feels that they haven't really committed any sins.
There are those women that believe that if they perform oral sex on every boyfriend they've ever had, and let him get his fingers sticky every now and then, that they're still virgins. Now they may bleed a bit the first time they have sex, but are they really virgins?
They have experience. I mean if she just lies there the first time you insert your member, but can play the flute on your instrument like she's written symphonies, has she really maintained her purity? At what point do we draw the line? When has the line between purity and experience been crossed?
I personally don't think that a girl who can inhale a kielbasa like it's a toothpick necessarily connotes the virgin type. If virginity lies in a hole and is not about experience, then our society has a very warped definition of what virginity really is.
Believe it or not, there are gals out there who will let you get into their anal canals, but will still aver that they are virgins. Anal sex, as well as oral sex (despite what Clinton says), has the word "sex" attached to it because that's exactly what it is. And once you have sex, you are no longer a virgin. Case closed.
So these women are under the illusion that as long as their vaginas remain untouched by the almighty penis, they can still claim to be pure. Pure crud, that is. And if men seem to think that this is a viable argument, then they're just horny and have no qualms about taking the back way in.

If you have had oral or anal sex already and you are thinking That you might as well go and have all the sex you want because you are not a virgin anyway, please rethink this. You can become a recycled virgin at anytime. You can have a second chance at being a born again virgin. Start really saving yourself for marriage from this point on. Then when you get married 3 years, 4 year, 10 years from now you can look at your spouse on your wedding night and say "I've waited for you for X amount of years. I've shown discipline in my life I can be trusted" Now that is special.
In a world were 7 out of 10 married couples under the age of 40 have some sort of infidelity you need spouse you can trust. What you do now is very indicative of what anyone can expect of you in the future.
If you don't control your sexuallity now why would anyone believe you would in the future?

I myself am a 27 year old virgin now and I only date virgins or time proven born again virgins who have been completely abstinent a minimum of 2 years, It might have to be longer depending on their previous sexual experience.
Anyone can change but sometimes you have to prove you have changed.
TRUE LOVE WAITS!
Any Questions? feel free to email me cheesguy1977@yahoo.com
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Old_Fashioned
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Posts: 62
Registered: 07-04-2004
Location: Rhode Island, USA

posted on 10-16-2004 at 00:52 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator


You got to me Guyvirgin! After reading your letter, I can accept the fact that doing those other acts can make a person not a virgin. By the way where ya been? I haven’t seen you online.

Now for Nessa and the rest of the members of this forum. Just because you now know that by committing any sexual acts means you are no longer a virgin, you don’t have to be discouraged by it. In other words, because you have done some of the acts, you don’t have to feel obligated to do the main one due to the fact you are no longer considered a virgin.

I hope that came out clear enough. If no one understood what I meant, please send me a e-mail. My native language is English but it doesn’t mean I can write or speak it well. :P
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guyvirgin1977
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Posts: 61
Registered: 10-03-2004
Location: Springfield Missouri

posted on 10-16-2004 at 07:15 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator


Hey Old Fashioned! Glad you now agree:D
And yes it's exactly like you said, Just because you have already commited an act that made you loose your virginity does not mean that you have to be obligated to keep doing those things (or more)
You can become a born again virgin at any time! I'm not as concerned with what you have done before you read this I am really concerned with what you do after you read this.
Here is a website that will help you if you wish to become a born again virgin http://www.geocities.com/thevirginclub/Secondary.htm

I also like this one if you have time-

http://www.lovematters.com/truelovewaits.htm
For those of you who are thinking- Jeremiah, You don't understand if I go back to my boyfriend and/or girlfriend and telll them- "I want the realationship, I don't want to break up..... but I don't want the sex"- they'll dump me!...... Well if that is the case what is your realationship based on??????...It's based on sex. Do you want a relationship based on sex?
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Old_Fashioned
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posted on 10-16-2004 at 12:37 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
Links???

Jeremiah, the love matter links don't work. I tried clicking them and I was brought to page not found.
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Poet_Daddy
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posted on 10-22-2004 at 21:05 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator


Oh, Lord.......there is no such thing as a "born-again virgin"...that's merely a nonsensical term to entice youths into abstinence.
Oral or anal sex does not constitute the loss of virginity either; in contrast to "innocence", virginity is a breeding concept in relation to marriage, meaning the vagina has never been penetrated, therefore it is impossible at the time of nuptials that the bride will bear the children of anyone beside the groom; this is why marrying a virgin was important in traditional cultures, so it is ensured that the real bloodline carries on. Oral and anal is irrelevant to this.
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guyvirgin1977
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posted on 10-23-2004 at 04:09 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator


You are the exact person I was talking about when I said "And if men seem to think that this is a viable argument, then they're just horny and have no qualms about taking the back way in."
You are a moron and I don't know what supposed cultures you are speaking of that don't consider oral sex to be sex.. The only culture that considers oral sex not sex is some modern american cultures. I can tell that you have smoked some weed in your lifetime.
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Poet_Daddy
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posted on 10-29-2004 at 14:53 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator


The idea of sexual advice and judgment from a virgin way past his prime is quite amusing.
Had you understood my post, you would have grasped that I did not say oral was not sex, but rather it was outside the concept of virginity, which has to do with ensured parentage. A girl who gives oral is definitely not innocent, but if she has never been vaginally penetrated, she is technically a virgin.
Your "weed" reference is puzzling, but suggests your troubled/crippled back story is many layered. Let me venture a guess: were you sexually abused when young by a weed-smoker? You know, you don't have to attack others to remove the trauma within yourself.
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guyvirgin1977
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Registered: 10-03-2004
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posted on 10-31-2004 at 01:33 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!
You obviously don't grasp the concept that once you have sex you are no longer a virgin. Now let me define a virgin for you -A person who has not experienced sex. That is a virgin not your twisted definition- Bill Clinton.
Your Weed-sexual abuse theory is funny, I did laugh when I read it. I was trying to be funny when I made that comment.
:P:P
As far as your statement "The idea of sexual advice and judgment from a virgin way past his prime is quite amusing."
First your comment that I'm "past my prime" is hilarious I'm in better shape than the majority of 18 year olds, I'm part owner of a mixed martial arts academy, plus I lift weights.
The reason I only
date virgins or born-again virgins of at least two years is because
I've learned with experience that only virgins rally understand how
precious sex is. I've learned that the other women will talk like the
understand it but in the end the prove they are just like the others, I even
had two of the non-virgins I dated try and force me to have sex with
them, But of course the didn't get to far.
Anyway, I've had some women get offended and say a whole lot of stuff
to me when they find out I only date virgins. Your material is
definitely nothing new. As far as being a boy until you have sex, that is the
pinnacle of stupidity. Do you know what makes gold valuable? Because it
is rare. The reason dirt is worthless is because it is everywhere we
go, it's all around us, the poorest Somalian in the country can reach
down and pick up a handful of dirt.
The same goes for women. I can go and pick up a normal woman just by
hanging out, at any mall, grocery store, club, or bar. No telling how
men they have said "yes" to (when it comes to sex). But finding a woman
who will say "NO! I'm waiting for my future husband" now that is rare.
Now that is a woman worth alot! That is a woman that can be trusted in a
world where 7 out of 10 married people under the age of 40 admit to
having sexual contact with someone other than their spouse.
If you say yes to every guy that you date, then your yes means nothing
when you say it to your future husband.
But... If you say no to every guy that asks you, and you say yes to
your future husband, now that is special. Your virginity is the most
infinitely valuable thing you can give to anyone.
So is taking advice from a virgin who actually understands the value of sex a bad idea? I don't think so.....
You see God invented sex. He invented it not us. He set the boundaries down
because he wants the best for his children. That boundary is marriage. Do
you know that 3 major universities (University of Boston, University of
Chicago, and UCLA) did a study costing five million dollars to find out
who is having the best sex in this country? They went into great detail on these studies including how often
these women reach the Big "O" ...........Do you know what every
single study found? Does you know who has the best sex in America????..................... Christian Married Monogamous (monogamy does not mean
one at a time it's one partner for life) Women!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Yeah they have the best
sex. That study had a whole lot of people dropping their chins. Rolling
Stone magazine was freaking out. The study ended up being called
"Revenge of the Church Ladies"
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Poet_Daddy
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posted on 11-01-2004 at 20:20 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator


The monogamous marriage of two virgins is naturally an admirable state, and I can respect that. But if you are a healthy man and as attractive as you say you are, why at 27 have you yet to find a mate?
Given that a desire to still play the field sounds ridiculous when there is no sex involved, as it would normally only be frustrating for all parties, what seems likely is that you are either unreasonably too picky, afraid of sex, or have an intimacy issue. At your age, something is wrong, and I urge you to get counseling.
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guyvirgin1977
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Posts: 61
Registered: 10-03-2004
Location: Springfield Missouri

posted on 11-02-2004 at 00:36 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!!!!
Oh my goodness, I hope you were just trying to be funny, because if you were serious then you have some extremely foolish logic.
Setting a date that you should be married by is incredibly foolish. In order to find the right one without lowering your standards (which is a huge mistake) YOU MUST BE COMFORTABLE BEING BY YOURSELF! That way you will never settle for less than you deserve. Divorce is wrong, so once you make a marriage commitment---- that is the person you will wake up next to, eat breakfast with, and talk with every single night for 30,40,50, or 60 years!!!!! You have to think about these things, if you settle for less than what you want---then you will be stuck with it the rest of your life. I won't be stuck with the wrong one.
I do date women-- but I don't know whether I will even get married. There definitely is no harm in remaining single. The Bible says, “It is good for unmarried to stay unmarried, but if unmarried can not control himself or herself, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to ‘burn with passion’.” So, if you can’t resist sexual abstinence, it is better to get married. For the purpose of sexual satisfaction, “Each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband. The wife’s body does not belong to her alone, but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband’s body does not belong to him alone, but also to his wife. Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer” (Corinthians 7).
I haven't found a woman I would like to spend 60 years with........ but I also am not in an unhappy marriage, I haven't gotten a divorce, I don't have to live with a baby's mother who hates me and is always after me for child support, I haven't left a woman pregnant, I don't have any children that I only see on weekends and can't be a real father to, and I don't have any children that will hate me because I wasn't there for them.
:D:D:D:D:D:D I just wake up a single, happy man :D:D:D:D:D:D:D
Anyway I'm curious why you can never really address anything I say, I'm kind of curious whether you even read what I write. You always write these 2 or 3 liners that never give any proof for anything.
Anyway I don't know about you, but I wouldn't want to be husband number 20 to somebody that had been married 19 times before. How special would I be? Oh wow I get to be husband number 20, oh wow that is so special.
Since I can't tell that you actually read what I have already proven. I think you need to be reminded what makes gold valuable...........It
is rare! The reason dirt is worthless is because it is everywhere we
go, it's all around us, the poorest Somalian in the country can reach
down and pick up a handful of dirt.
The same goes for MEN. Any woman can go and pick up a normal man just by
hanging out, at any mall, grocery store, club, or bar. No telling how
women they have said "yes" to (when it comes to sex). But finding a man
who will say "NO! I'm waiting for my future husband" now that is rare.
Now that is a man worth alot! That is a man that can be trusted in
a
world where 7 out of 10 married people under the age of 40 admit to
having sexual contact with someone other than their spouse (while they
are married).
If he says "yes" to every girl that he dates, then his "yes" means nothing
when he says it to your future wife.
But... If he says "no" to every girl that asks him, then he say "yes" to
his future wife, now that is special. Every woman wants to feel special, and that is one awesome way to say it!
If I do get married, my wife will certainly know the amount of respect I have for her since I waited for her, she will know I have integrity and convictions, and she will certainly know I can control myself, so she will definitely never have to worry about me cheating on her.
Most importantly she will know that she is the recipient of the most valuable gift I can give to anyone...something no one else has ever had, and something no one else will ever get.....my virginity...If you REALLY love your wife you will wish you had waited for your wife.
That is certainly better than telling your wife on your honeymoon that she gets to be notch number 20 on your bed. Is there anything special about being the 20th person? The thought of that just makes me sick to my stomach.
I think you know I'm right, you just don't want to be wrong, so you give these ridiculous two or three line ad hominem arguments. Dude, you don't have to argue with me just so you won't be wrong. I told you before you can start over whenever you want.:):)
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Poet_Daddy
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posted on 11-02-2004 at 19:06 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator


quote:
Originally posted by guyvirgin1977
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!!!!



Not only are you an idiot, but for telling that poor self-conscious girl to kill herself, you are nothing but a vicious piece of trash.
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guyvirgin1977
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posted on 11-02-2004 at 21:05 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
WHAT????????

Dude....... I think you are mixed up or something........or you are just trying to put words in my mouth.......noone has told her to kill herself.......are you feeling ok over there?????
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guyvirgin1977
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posted on 11-03-2004 at 04:46 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
Think before you speak

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!
Ok dude, you really made yourself look foolish on this one. I figured out what you were talking about, I read it on another post (the name of the post is "breasts"). On this other post someone (ZiO) told a girl to kill herself. However I had nothing to do with it. If you had bothered to take two seconds to verify your facts before falsely accusing me, you wouldn't look so dumb.
You really should think before you speak, especially when accusing someone of something like this.
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Wannabe Detector
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posted on 11-10-2004 at 05:20 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
What kind of name is "POET DADDY"?????

I needed to respond to this one. If you give yourself a name like "poet daddy" you need to actually be "poetic" in the way you respond. Your answers are half-witted at best. You shouldn't be able to name yourself on this forum. If the people on this forum named you-- your name would probably be..... "Simple-Minded Son"
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melvaughn
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posted on 07-03-2005 at 08:07 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
Re

I can't believe there are supposed christians on this site who are rude and call each other morons. If any non christians were to frequet this site it would give christianity a BAD name. Christians are suppose to be NON-JUDGMENTAL, not a holier than thou attitude!
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jpwpAE5m
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posted on 07-06-2005 at 11:37 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
Smarts

I go to a Christain Bible College and am insulted of the lack of common sense. People need to close thereselves in with God.

Discusions of such orgion won't be need because you be engulfed with God are father and friend. With that in mind I will be on my way God Bless and have a good day
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Luckygohappy
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posted on 07-15-2005 at 17:34 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
Wait a sec...

So if a girl gives a handjob, she's a virgin, but if she gives head, she's not?? that's pretty messed up!!

Sex is penetration, whether vaginal or anal. Really, if you think about it, there's not much difference between the two.

(and honestly, I dont' see what the big thing is about anal sex anyway... personally, it doesn't hurt, but it doesn't feel good either *shrug*)
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Charizma
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posted on 09-27-2006 at 16:07 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
Illiteracy should be outlawed

Anal SEX? Well that is news because the last time I checked the word sex meant to have sex. Please don't have virgins around the planet running around having anal sex and calling themselves virgins. You are not a virgin even if you technically think you are. You may not have used your other hole or even your mouth, but you still had sex (even if it was with your anus). I guess if you really want to hold on to the title so badly you could describe yourself as an "Everything But" Virgin-guys will know just what you mean. For those of you not in the "know" this basically means you do everything but have vaginal sex. So, you've experience all the other types of sex. Wow what a virgin you are...do you sense the sarcasm?
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marguerite
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posted on 10-01-2006 at 15:03 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
anal sex

Anal sex and oral sex is sex or they wouldn't call is oral and anal SEX. You can't have sex and still be a virgin either you are or you aren't.
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David84
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posted on 10-03-2006 at 05:20 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
yea

'Anal sex and oral sex is sex or they wouldn't call is oral and anal SEX. You can't have sex and still be a virgin either you are or you aren't. '

so a handjob is different than oral sex why? simply because it doesn't have the 'sex' word in it, it's alright?


right..
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cheerstar
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posted on 10-28-2006 at 07:25 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
...

you are still a virgin untile you have sex vaginaly.
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xieh
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posted on 10-29-2006 at 02:58 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
grrr

man I hate it when people use long lines "haha's" that messes with the justification of the site... *sigh*.. *zooms out*..
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guyvirgin1977
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posted on 06-04-2007 at 16:08 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
INDEED ORAL SEX AND ANAL SEX ARE STILL SEX!!!!! ONCE YOU HAVE SEX YOU ARE NO LONGER A VIRGIN!!!!!!!

Hey Guys:)
It's been about two years since I have logged on I'm 29 now (STILL PRACTICING ABSTINENCE) and I'm pleasantly surprised to see there are not very many one line comebacks with no counter point what-so-ever posted :)......"cheerstar" what is the point of even posting a little one line of opinion when you have obviously not even read the rest of the posting! Read the rest of the postings and reply with counterpoints supported by facts.


I have had a few people email my old address with questions, I only check that account about every 3 months:P So I will give my other address that I check often.

lthobbes@yahoo.com

Feel free to email me about anything just please do not try to argue with one line of opinion. As you can see alot of people on this site like to "argue" with one line of opinion even when they are faced with a full page of facts.... Opinion proves nothing and I have very little time to write anyway, I will not waste time on people who just want to "argue" with little one liner opinions that don't have an ounce of fact:) However intelligent discussions are ALWAYS welcome:):):)
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Blank_Wall
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posted on 06-04-2007 at 22:49 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
GuyVirgin1977

'Hey Guys:)
It's been about two years since I have logged on I'm 29 now (STILL PRACTICING ABSTINENCE) and I'm pleasantly surprised to see there are not very many one line comebacks with no counter point what-so-ever posted :)......"cheerstar" what is the point of even posting a little one line of opinion when you have obviously not even read the rest of the posting! Read the rest of the postings and reply with counterpoints supported by facts.


I have had a few people email my old address with questions, I only check that account about every 3 months:P So I will give my other address that I check often.

lthobbes@yahoo.com

Feel free to email me about anything just please do not try to argue with one line of opinion. As you can see alot of people on this site like to "argue" with one line of opinion even when they are faced with a full page of facts.... Opinion proves nothing and I have very little time to write anyway, I will not waste time on people who just want to "argue" with little one liner opinions that don't have an ounce of fact:) However intelligent discussions are ALWAYS welcome:):):)
'
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I’ve been reading through this thread, and you’ve made some very logical arguments
in support of virginity and abstinence - then you acknowledge the validity of so-called
“born-again virgins”. So you believe that a person can have sex with 100 people,
then wake up one morning and decide to become a “born-again virgin”. So then,
a few years later, that person decides to lose their “virginity”, and has sex with 100
more people, then wakes up another morning and decides to become a “born-again virgin” again.

How many times can a person be “reborn” as a virgin?

As you’ve stated yourself: Once a person has sex, they are no longer a virgin.

The term “born-again virgin” is an oxymoron to say the least - with the emphasis upon
the MORON part - and I think it’s a bit insulting to those of us who actually ARE virgins
- and have borne the consequences that come with it.

I don’t see how you can reconcile such a gross inconsistency.
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guyvirgin1977
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posted on 06-05-2007 at 03:37 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
Born Again Virgins - Perhaps this needs it's own thread

Being a Born Agian Virgin is only valid when a TRUE change has been made. They will still have things they have to tell their future spouses about, however they will have a period of purity to give their spouse, and that means alot, especially when you are talking about 3 years or more.....

Let me start by telling you how honorable it is
that you
practice abstinence
and that your future spouse will unquestionably
appreciate it. Chastity absolutely does
say everything about one's character, integrity, self
respect and the
level of respect that they have for their future
spouse.
Please let me tell you about me and my take on the
subject, Please understand that I have had
this conversation many, many, many times and I have
been called
judgmental, and told I need to be more forgiving, etc,
etc many times so
this is my answer (sorry it's so long but like I said
I've had this
conversation too many times and this conversation goes
almost the same way every single time so I'll just
give all the answers up front)
Anyway we all make mistakes, It's just very important
that we learn from them and cease to continue....A
history of actions speaks much louder than words...
Know what I mean?
I work in a Jail, I don't know how many times I
have heard "I'll never be back" from the inmates when
they are leaving ..... Now... when they said that, did
they mean it??.... Of
course they did......Do I believe them just
because they believe themselves???.... Of course
not.... Now
if one of them comes up to me fives years later and
tells me he hasn't been in jail since and he will
never be back do you think I'm much more inclined to
believe that he has really changed?.... Of course.
Here's my point- I only date virgins and women who
have been a born again virgin a very minimum of two
years(preferably 3-5 years depending on situation). To
parallel this- I've had women come right out of their
sexual relationships and say "I don't want to have
sex anymore, I want to be with you". These women just
don't get it, I do encourage them, but they don't
understand why I won't date them (because they believe
themselves), and then they eventually go right back
into their old ways.
I have had the question a zillion times- Isn't
that
judgmental? or.. shouldn't you be more
forgiving..or..How can you set a time limit like that?
I have had the question (more...) a zillion times-
Isn't
that
judgmental? or.. shouldn't you be more
forgiving..or..How can you set a time limit like that?
I think I've very clearly answered the time limit
question with my very accurate parallel with the
inmates in jail, but as for the other two questions I
have this to say-Everyone has standards, some people
want someone who is cute, no one
calls that person superficial. Some people want
someone who is funny,
should that person be more forgiving of people's lack
on humor? If
someone wants someone who is loyal are they too
focused on a small trait? So
if I want a virgin why does that automatically make me
judgmental? Just
because it's not popular? Just because the vast
majority of women my
age aren't virgins? Because women don't want to look
at their sexual
past as a bad thing? Not at all. Standards are
standards. The only stupid
standard is the double standard.
Just because we have all sinned and fallen short of
the glory of God
DOES NOT MEAN we illogically say that someones' past
is not very
indicative of what we can expect in that some person's
future. I already
explained that people certainly can change but there
certainly is a proving
ground.

I'm sure everyone agrees that talk is cheap.....Actions are really how you can define a person. What I am getting at is you need to become a born again virgin now. Then when you get married you can look at the man you are going to spend the rest of your life with and tell him, "for the last 3,4,5,10 years I've been waiting for you I've been practicing discipline in my life and I can be trusted" That would speak to me and the heart of any other worthwhile guy that will actually care about you and not just want to get sex.

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Blank_Wall
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Posts: 43
Registered: 02-09-2007
Location: Houston, TX

posted on 06-05-2007 at 17:23 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
The Question Remains Unanswered

'Being a Born Agian Virgin is only valid when a TRUE change has been made. They will still have things they have to tell their future spouses about, however they will have a period of purity to give their spouse, and that means alot, especially when you are talking about 3 years or more.....

Let me start by telling you how honorable it is
that you
practice abstinence
and that your future spouse will unquestionably
appreciate it. Chastity absolutely does
say everything about one's character, integrity, self
respect and the
level of respect that they have for their future
spouse.
Please let me tell you about me and my take on the
subject, Please understand that I have had
this conversation many, many, many times and I have
been called
judgmental, and told I need to be more forgiving, etc,
etc many times so
this is my answer (sorry it's so long but like I said
I've had this
conversation too many times and this conversation goes
almost the same way every single time so I'll just
give all the answers up front)
Anyway we all make mistakes, It's just very important
that we learn from them and cease to continue....A
history of actions speaks much louder than words...
Know what I mean?
I work in a Jail, I don't know how many times I
have heard "I'll never be back" from the inmates when
they are leaving ..... Now... when they said that, did
they mean it??.... Of
course they did......Do I believe them just
because they believe themselves???.... Of course
not.... Now
if one of them comes up to me fives years later and
tells me he hasn't been in jail since and he will
never be back do you think I'm much more inclined to
believe that he has really changed?.... Of course.
Here's my point- I only date virgins and women who
have been a born again virgin a very minimum of two
years(preferably 3-5 years depending on situation). To
parallel this- I've had women come right out of their
sexual relationships and say "I don't want to have
sex anymore, I want to be with you". These women just
don't get it, I do encourage them, but they don't
understand why I won't date them (because they believe
themselves), and then they eventually go right back
into their old ways.
I have had the question a zillion times- Isn't
that
judgmental? or.. shouldn't you be more
forgiving..or..How can you set a time limit like that?
I have had the question (more...) a zillion times-
Isn't
that
judgmental? or.. shouldn't you be more
forgiving..or..How can you set a time limit like that?
I think I've very clearly answered the time limit
question with my very accurate parallel with the
inmates in jail, but as for the other two questions I
have this to say-Everyone has standards, some people
want someone who is cute, no one
calls that person superficial. Some people want
someone who is funny,
should that person be more forgiving of people's lack
on humor? If
someone wants someone who is loyal are they too
focused on a small trait? So
if I want a virgin why does that automatically make me
judgmental? Just
because it's not popular? Just because the vast
majority of women my
age aren't virgins? Because women don't want to look
at their sexual
past as a bad thing? Not at all. Standards are
standards. The only stupid
standard is the double standard.
Just because we have all sinned and fallen short of
the glory of God
DOES NOT MEAN we illogically say that someones' past
is not very
indicative of what we can expect in that some person's
future. I already
explained that people certainly can change but there
certainly is a proving
ground.

I'm sure everyone agrees that talk is cheap.....Actions are really how you can define a person. What I am getting at is you need to become a born again virgin now. Then when you get married you can look at the man you are going to spend the rest of your life with and tell him, "for the last 3,4,5,10 years I've been waiting for you I've been practicing discipline in my life and I can be trusted" That would speak to me and the heart of any other worthwhile guy that will actually care about you and not just want to get sex.

'

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I’ll respond to the rest of your post later (GuyVirgin1977).

For now, I’m going to press for an answer to my question:
How many times can a person be “reborn” as a virgin?
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guyvirgin1977
Member


Posts: 61
Registered: 10-03-2004
Location: Springfield Missouri

posted on 06-10-2007 at 16:01 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
The "reborn" identity

Ok I think the best way to answer this question of "How many times can a person be “reborn” as a virgin?" is with a question.......

If I were to ask you "how many times can a smoker be "reborn" as a non-smoker" how would you answer that?

You are probably thinking - Well.... Either you've quit or you haven't..... Could there ever come a point in which someone backslides so many times that even if they quit for ten years they are still considered a smoker???

I'm assuming that what you are concerned about is people that will continually claim to be a "born again" or "recycled" virgin every time they break-up from a sexual relationship.....

Well, let me affirm that your concerns ARE VERY VALID!!!!!!!!!!

Like I think I mentioned in my earlier post - I only date virgins and women who
have been a born again virgin a very minimum of two
years(preferably 3-5 years depending on situation). To
parallel this- I've had women come right out of their
sexual relationships and say "I don't want to have
sex anymore, I want to be with you". These women just
don't get it, I do encourage them, but they don't
understand why I won't date them (because they believe
themselves), and then they eventually go right back
into their old ways.

Your concerns are very valid but people certainly can change..... Look at Saul he was one of the biggest persecutors of Christians of all time..... Then He changed, God came into his life... He became Paul one of the greatest apostles to ever live.....

On the other hand there are plenty of fakes, phonies, drama queens, and players who "cry wolf" so often that they can't be believed.... Trust me, I'm not only a 29 year old virgin, but I'm also a Correction Officer who works with people every day who claim they have changed....... The best test is the test of time.....

So let me sum this up- If someone breaks up and comes out of a sexual relationship they are very hurt and very emotionally charged to think they will never get hurt or used again..... Most of these people coming out of these relationships will LOVE the idea of having someone who practices abstinence...........

_____Allow me to interject some experience- as a Correction Officer it never ceases to amaze me, that people always can justify what they do, no matter how evil..... Also these same people will always compare themselves to someone who they think is worse than they are..... People always think that deep down "I'm a good person".....

To continue on with my summary ---- These people coming out of these relationships always think of someone more promiscuous or "sluttier" than they are.....

So TIME... It's the best way to know if a true chagne has been made....
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Blank_Wall
Member


Posts: 43
Registered: 02-09-2007
Location: Houston, TX

posted on 06-11-2007 at 21:39 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
Allow Me To Clarify ...

'Ok I think the best way to answer this question of "How many times can a person be “reborn”
as a virgin?" is with a question.......

If I were to ask you "how many times can a smoker be "reborn" as a non-smoker" how would
you answer that?
###################################################################################

Usually, when a person quits smoking, they are often referred to as an “ex-smoker”.

The problem with your analogy is that, a “virgin” is someone who has never had sex,
while a “smoker” is a person who smokes. When a smoker stops smoking, they then become
an “ex-smoker” (or a “non-smoker”). When a person stops having sex, they do not become
a virgin again - which has been my whole point all along.

To answer your question with a question: If a person murders someone, then is incarcerated,
do they become a “non-murderer” because they haven’t killed anyone lately?


###################################################################################
You are probably thinking - Well.... Either you've quit or you haven't..... Could there
ever come a point in which someone backslides so many times that even if they quit for
ten years they are still considered a smoker???

I'm assuming that what you are concerned about is people that will continually claim to
be a "born again" or "recycled" virgin every time they break-up from a sexual relationship.....

Well, let me affirm that your concerns ARE VERY VALID!!!!!!!!!!
###################################################################################

It’s not really a concern so much as it’s my whole point: A person cannot just
claim to be a “virgin” (qualified with the “born-again” part or not) just because
they haven’t had sex lately - it’s absurd.


###################################################################################
Like I think I mentioned in my earlier post - I only date virgins and women who
have been a born again virgin a very minimum of two
years(preferably 3-5 years depending on situation). To
parallel this- I've had women come right out of their
sexual relationships and say "I don't want to have
sex anymore, I want to be with you". These women just
don't get it, I do encourage them, but they don't
understand why I won't date them (because they believe
themselves), and then they eventually go right back
into their old ways.

Your concerns are very valid but people certainly can change..... Look at Saul he was
one of the biggest persecutors of Christians of all time..... Then He changed, God came
into his life... He became Paul one of the greatest apostles to ever live.....

On the other hand there are plenty of fakes, phonies, drama queens, and players who
"cry wolf" so often that they can't be believed.... Trust me, I'm not only a 29 year
old virgin, but I'm also a Correction Officer who works with people every day who
claim they have changed....... The best test is the test of time.....

So let me sum this up- If someone breaks up and comes out of a sexual relationship
they are very hurt and very emotionally charged to think they will never get hurt
or used again..... Most of these people coming out of these relationships will LOVE
the idea of having someone who practices abstinence...........

_____Allow me to interject some experience- as a Correction Officer it never ceases
to amaze me, that people always can justify what they do, no matter how evil.....
Also these same people will always compare themselves to someone who they think
is worse than they are..... People always think that deep down "I'm a good person".....


To continue on with my summary ---- These people coming out of these relationships
always think of someone more promiscuous or "sluttier" than they are.....

So TIME... It's the best way to know if a true chagne has been made.... '
#############################################################################

One thing that needs to be clarified is that I’m not taking issue with your
“2-year litmus test” - if it works for you then go with it.

I’m taking issue with the whole concept of a “born-again virgin” - as I’m making
the case that it’s an absurdity that crumbles when subjected to close and objective
scrutiny.

All of this stuff that you’ve been typing WRT “time being the best way to know”
is extraneous and irrelevant to that discussion.

You’ve raised the issue of trust, and the risk of someone who is in a committed
relationship engaging in acts of infidelity. That risk will ALWAYS be there
- whether the person/people involved were virgins before the initiation
of their relationship - or not.

The best thing that a person can do would be to minimize that risk factor, choosing
a person that is not as likely to cheat as someone else - and the “2-year litmus test”
would be one way of reducing that risk - but I’m extremely skeptical that it would
completely eliminate it.

You’ve indicated that you’re a Correction Officer, so I don’t have to tell you that
a person who commits murder for the first time will generally find it an easier thing
to do if they are in a position to do it again - which is why most murderers are
either incarcerated for life - or executed.

That’s mainly because a murderer doesn’t place the same value upon human life
that most other people are inclined to do. It is from that mentality that they can
more-easily rationalize the act than most other people can.

It’s the same way with most other manifestations of human behavior - including sex.

If a person has sex with 100 people, then it’s safe to assume that the person
in question doesn’t place much significance upon the act - “it’s only sex”.
If that person were to then involve themselves within an intimate LTR, they
could very well remain faithful, but there would be a much greater risk of
infidelity should the person in question be placed within a circumstance where
they would be tempted - relative to someone who has had sex with only one person
in their lifetime: Their Significant Other. When both people within a relationship
have never had sex with anyone other than their relationship partner, then it becomes
a part of the bond between them - the sex becomes something of significance - and that
would tend to reduce the risk of either of them giving in to temptation.

There is also, of course, the risk of contracting a STD (including HIV/AIDS) from
the so-called “born-again virgin”. Given that 1 in 4 of every adult person in the
United States has an STD of some sort, that is something that should not be taken
lightly.


... but this issue goes beyond that of risk minimalization.


If a person has had sex with 100 people before yourself, then you will become
the 101'st person that she has had sex with - you will become the 101'st notch
on her bedpost - “born-again virgin” or otherwise. The sex that you will have
with each other will not have much significance, as it is something that the
“born-again virgin” has done with many others before - it will not have the
same value as it did when she had sex for the first time.


... and the first time that a person has sex is usually something that is
very significant to them.


This observation is validated by the fact that friends will often ask each other
(and relate to each other) their “first time” (for having sex) - it’s a fairly
common-place question that often gets asked.

It’s for the reasons above that I will INSIST that any girl that I might have
an intimate relationship with MUST be a virgin - and not of the “born-again”
variety either. I will be her “first time” as she will be mine - the act will
hold the same significance for each of us - and will REMAIN something of
significance every time we have sex - to become a part of the bond between us.
I don’t hold out much hope that this will ever happen (as I fully expect that
I will die a virgin), but I don’t really have a problem with that.

.
View User's Profile E-Mail User User's Site View All Replies By Blank_Wall (only searches replies by default, for topics please run another search) U2U Member
Parthena
Member


Posts: 57
Registered: 07-07-2007
Location: Greece

posted on 06-15-2009 at 08:48 Reply With Quote Report Post to Moderator
Great discussion!

I agree with what both of you are saying here and applaud you both for your choices. It's a good thing when you're so secure in yourself and your beliefs that you can confidently assert your standards in all situations. I would tend to side with Blank_Wall overall though and say that nobody can really be a virgin who has had sex (and rape doesn't count in my book, because it is nothing but an act of violence). It is definitely true that women (and men I suppose) never forget their first time. It's not just about the other person, the person that you love and you want to make love with, it's about YOU. It's about the first time that you express yourself sexually fully with another person. I believe that is a sacred thing and it is nobody's business but yours and the other person's.
View User's Profile E-Mail User View All Replies By Parthena (only searches replies by default, for topics please run another search) U2U Member
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